It is not rare when people approach me, asking questions about my life and praising my strength, saying I inspire them and have changed their view on life. Every time that happens though, I become confused. I thank them for the wonderful gesture, but ponder quietly to myself. There is nothing extraordinary about me, truthfully. I’m just a simple teenager whom life has thrown a few obstacles towards.
People who say I am strong only know the one side of me; the side I seem content and happy, pursuing everyday as if it were my last. They see a funny, bright girl, with a sense of sarcasm. What they don’t see is the girl who comes home, sits in her room and utter silence for hours, completely empty and blank. They do not see the girl who drowns in her oceans of tears, the memories creating tsunami tides. They do not see the girl who believes she is nothing.
If I inspire people, they tend to say it is either through my writing or what I’ve been through. I very deeply appreciate it whenever my writing effects others, as that is my goal with language.on the other hand, when people are inspired by me and what I’ve gone through, that is not me having any effect on them at all. That is simply them being amazed and realizing how common and horrifying cancer really is.
I am simple. I enjoy writing and reading, as well as sleeping. I love the internet as much as any other teen would. Music? Um, yes. Music is my life in many ways, as with so many others. There are other girls out there who’ve lost their mother at a young age like me, and other girls who have felt the pain that comes along with depression, also like me. My favorite color is burgundy and I love mashed potatoes and apple pie, but never together. I have amazing friends and people I prefer not to be around. I am not anything special. I am ordinary.
I feel pain, like anybody else.
I feel joy
Just like anybody else.
I am not a robot-like machine. I have a heartbeat, veins, a pulse, bones, and a mind of my own. I am a human, just like you. Give yourself some credit for once, after all, you are here, reading my blog, helping me achieve my dream. That’s pretty outstanding to me.